Coulda shoulda woulda been 4 months old

Today our sweet little peanut would have been 4 months old.  I get to imagine what she would be doing right now if she were still with us.  Would she be rolling over, scooting, giggling at her older sister and brother?  What would her personality be like?  She would no doubt be stubborn and strong, a real fighter's spirit.  She would be ours and we would relish in every second we had with her.  Today, I'm ready to share a picture of our sweet baby with you.  I only wish that I would have taken a million more pictures of her while I had the chance.  I love photography and had my camera with me at the hospital, but in those moments all I could think about was how I didn't want to disturb her or make her uncomfortable.  I wanted to love on her and memorize every ounce of her with my eyes.  This is one picture that I will cherish forever.  It is one of the very few we have of Alyssa with her eyes open.  My brother, Garrett, captured it on his cell phone shortly after she was born.  Not the best quality, but a cherished memory none the less.  All of our pictures taken with our regular camera are of her with her eyes closed.  The prostaglandin medicine used to keep her PDA open until surgery made her very sleepy.

Alyssa Lorraine just hours old, all 6 lbs 13 ozs of her.